[HQ / yaoi / KuroTsuki] Among the stars, I can't see the moon anymore

Titre : Among the stars, I can't see the moon anymore
Pairing : Kuroo Tetsurou x Tsukishima Kei
Résumé : Tsukishima a été diagnostiqué avec une maladie incurable, actuellement en phase terminale. Comme si cela ne suffisait pas, on lui annonce également qu'il ne lui reste que quelques semaines à vivre... alors au moins, avant de quitter ce monde, il veut passer ses derniers moments avec l'être qui compte le plus à ses yeux, son petit ami Kuroo.
Note-s : A la base pour le krtsk week (and a half), mais je sais vraiiiiment pas si je pourrais l'écrire à temps ^^" J'ai les idées et tout mais le physique ne suit pas... enfin, j'espère l'écrire au plus vite quand même ! Ceci note mon premier angst aussi... putain et dire que je vais oser tuer Tsukki quoiiiii T____T
Source-s d'inspiration : Plusieurs prompts de la semaine consacrée au pairing : insecurities, failling in love over and over, stargazing & college !
Wish you were here Avril Lavigne

Spoiler:

Chapter 1: The beginning of the end
Chapter Text

Staring at the grey sky through the window, Tsukishima Kei has a lifeless look. There weren’t any cloud, any mark left by the planes, any sunny spell that could light this sky : it was as grey and as blank as his life since several years.

Sat on a bed, dressed in white, with the constant noise of the machine that measured his heartbeats, he closed his eyes a moment, tired to stare at the same scenery since days. The room where he was set was desperately empty, and had the faint scent of medicine. The hospital bed where he was sat was soft, and the pillow was used enough to have his scent on it.

It’s been days since he didn’t go out of this space; fortunately for him, his boyfriend was his link to the outside… but unfortunately for him, he couldn’t visit him the day since the latter was still going to college and had volleyball training; however, he was coming on the evening. Tsukishima was always looking forward to those moments he could share with him, because it was always funny and they were the only moments he could smile and even laugh a little.

Several days before, the doctor announced him : “Tsukishima-kun, you already know your illness is incurable but… actually there’s more… how should I say this; the results of your last examination aren’t good. You have just some few weeks left to live, at least.”
It was as if the Earth was crushing under his feet; a few weeks more, that’s all ?

Since this announcement, he was staying on his bed, just having some visits from the nurses that he always looked with a blank look, without even exchanging words with them. The only thing that could distract him on day time was the color of the sky, and the noises coming from outside; since it was an hospital, he could hear all kind of complaints, screams, talks, and noises he couldn’t hear if he was actually walking on the streets… all these noises were helping him to put his situation into perspective : maybe there was some people dying at the moment he could hear those screams or those persons crying.

Waiting for his boyfriend to come, the minutes and the hours seemed to be infinite.

When night began to fall, Tsukishima was regaining some colors : the moment he was waiting for all the evenings since weeks was about to take place. When he heard the door opening and saw the bed hair of his boyfriend trying to hide, he let out a little chuckle before smiling.

“Hey hey hey~ ! Good evening, Kei ! Guess who’re here~ ?” said the mysterious voice, that wasn’t this mysterious since it was the voice Tsukishima loved above all; also, the owner of this voice didn’t hide at all from the blond boy's perspective.
“Kuroo-san… I can see your hair… you should find better if you want to surprise me,” simply stated the tall boy.
“Oooh, but don’t think it’s over…” began Kuroo, “I have something that should surprise you… here ! Tadah !” he finished, while unveiling from his behind what seemed to be a cake box.
“I bought your beloved strawberry cake ! Let’s eat it together !” announced the boy, before taking a seat and placing it in front of the bed of his lover.
“Ah… thank you for the thought Kuroo-san, but… I’m not that hungry… just eat it without me…” said with a trembling voice Tsukishima.
“What ?!” exclaimed Kuroo. “You aren’t eating your beloved cake ? What’s wrong Kei ? Are you hurt somewhere ?” he finished, while pouting.

That’s right, Kuroo didn’t know about the doctor’s announcement; it’s just been days after all, and when his boyfriend was coming to visit him, it was enough for him to forget about it and just focus about the moments he could spend with him… so Tsukishima was just hiding it from him; even though he didn’t think he could hide it from his most precious person anymore.

“Well, you see Kuroo-san, actually I’m…” began the boy. He then explained everything until now, including the doctor’s announcement. Kuroo was listening with attention, and didn’t interrupt him during his speech. “… and that’s the deal. I just have a few weeks left,” the blond boy finished in a small voice.

It was surely too much to handle for Kuroo. After letting out a sigh, he stood up and headed to the window, where night already fell in the room. He stayed some seconds silent, trying to deal with his knotted throat : a strong wave of emotions was now invading his head. He was trying to find the words; but maybe words alone weren’t enough ? How to react after such an announcement ? What should you say when you just learn the person you love the most will disappear in a matter of time ?

Obviously, there weren’t words for this. Even if all the words gathered it wouldn’t be enough.

Staring at the sky through the window, Kuroo let out a whisper, enough for Tsukishima to hear him : “The moon is beautiful tonight, isn’t it ?” before turning back to his lover, causing their look to cross : “You know Kei, no matter what happens I…” he began, trying not to let some tears falling down. “I will always be here for you. It always has been, and it’ll always be, I promise.”

Some seconds are passing before Tsukishima bursted into laughter, surprising Kuroo. It’s been years since they were going out together, but there wasn’t so many moments when he saw his adorable tall blondie lover laughing this honestly.
“What’s wrong with you Kuroo-san ? Hahaha !! It doesn’t suit you to say such embarrassing stuff ! Aaah, my belly hurts… ! Hahaha !!” said the boy while holding his belly.
“What, you’re really mean Kei ! I was really meaning it !” protested Kuroo.
“I know,” smiled gently the tall boy, calming his laughter, “I was just wondering why you said it suddenly,” he finished with a calm voice.
Kuroo simply smiled back, without giving an answer. He then get back to the seat he left empty and began to speak about another subject : at first it was awkward since Tsukishima didn’t understand why he was talking about another topic while he just announced him something this important.

Sighing a little, he eventually reached the conclusion that it was maybe too hurtful to speak about it and joined Kuroo in his conversation : it quickly became a joyful chat. Both of them lost track on time as night was passing, and the moment when Kuroo had to go back home arrived; he just kissed his lover on the forehead before saying good night, and at the door, he said, like a promise : “See you tomorrow !”

Outside, the sky was dark yet clear, not letting appear any cloud, unveiling the full moon reigning; and the stars.

The following days, Kuroo took the resolution to spend all his free time with his lover, wanting to enjoy every moment he could with him. Fortunately, it was almost time for his break, meaning that he could spend even more time with his boyfriend; the first day, he took him on a walk : it’s been a while since Tsukishima didn’t walk so at first it was a bit difficult, but Kuroo was really patient so he could manage it in the end. As usual, they spent the evening in Tsukishima’s room at the hospital, talking about everything and anything; during those times, the blondie could forget about the cruel truth awaiting him… in a matter of time.

Kuroo was always varying the activities as days were passing, so that his lover couldn’t get bored and also so he could try everything he wanted before leaving this world. As they spend days like this, it was like an utopia : just the two of them, laughing together, walking, chatting, eating together and having lovey-dovey moments like every couple in the world; Tsukishima could forget about his disease for a moment, and putting aside the scary thought that crossed his mind every night when he was about to sleep :

“I’m going to disappear.”

Thanks to Kuroo, Tsukishima was out of his room almost every day, except the moment when he had to take his health examinations; and as expected, it only got worse, as his disease was degenerative. Sure, all the trips he was doing with his lover was avoiding him to over-think about his future, but the condition of his body damaged, since he was spending more energy outside than in his hospital room.
One evening, Kuroo took his lover at the secret place he found while doing his jogging : it was pretty deep in the forest, but the scenery that awaited them was more than Tsukishima excepted; he could see all the extent of the sky, which seemed infinite, along with pretty colors; and above all, there was still the moon among the stars.
“Pretty isn’t it ? I absolutely wanted to bring you here. Whenever I feel down I’m always here. It makes me think about you and afterwards I can do my best,” admitted Kuroo, looking his lover in the eyes.
“Yeah, it sure is,” straightforwardly said the blondie while interlacing his fingers in Kuroo’s.

They stayed some minutes more staring at the sky before the wind became too strong, forcing them to go back to the hospital. Night already fell, and when they arrived in the hospital room, the countdown came back in Tsukishima’s head. He let out a big sigh before sitting on his bed; only the moon’s light was entering the room, letting float a mysterious atmosphere. Looking in his lover’s eyes, Tsukishima said : “Kuroo-san… now it’s just some days left…”; the boy was wearing a sorrowful look. No matter how hard he tried to postpone it, time is time, and it couldn’t be changed.

“… is that so,” simply stated Kuroo, “then I will stay here tonight. I’m not going to let you down. Ever.”

While saying these words, he closed the distance with his lover before kissing him and pushing him in the bed. “I’m going to make you mine tonight,” he said in a serious tone.

The countdown reduced from days to days, and as ‘the moment’ was coming, both of them were feeling uneasy; Kuroo wanted to spend as much time as possible with his most precious person, but knew it was useless because it was bond to disappear anyway; Tsukishima was afraid Kuroo would give up on him because he thought he didn’t want to get hurt anymore.

They had a discussion on another nightfall, a few days before the countdown would finish.
“I wonder… if you’ll forget me after I disappear, Kuroo-san ?” asked in an innocent way the blondie.
“You know Kei,” began Kuroo as he let out a sigh, ignoring his question, “we’re going out since years now and I never heard you calling me by my first name. I’d say it’s pretty heartbreaking,” he finished, pouting.
“Until my last breath I won’t say it,” replied the boy, chuckling, “but never mind that… will you forget me after I disappear ?” repeated the blondie.
“Don’t ever dare say it again even if it’s a joke, Kei,” said Kuroo with a curt tone, “isn’t that obvious I won’t forget you ? You’re my lover, my everything, and even if I wanted to forget you I couldn’t.” he finished with a trembling voice.

His eyes widen in surprise, before he lowered his head, putting his hands on his forearm. “You know Kuroo-san, I’m afraid. Afraid to leave you, afraid to know you’ll surely find another significant one than me… I’m being egoistic but I can’t help myself but think about it. But… in another hand I want your happiness. So please, when I’ll—”
He didn’t have the time to finish his sentence; Kuroo stopped him with a passionate kiss, making him forgetting all his doubts.

“I’m yours Kei, and you’re mine,” he almost whispered, pushing Tsukishima on the bed, grabbing his wrists. He then looked straight into his eyes, and continued : “Even if you disappear, I’ll find you once more, and I’ll once again fall in love with you, over and over; I don’t imagine my life with another person than you by my side.”

Tsukishima just closed his eyes as he heard this affirmation, letting Kuroo’s sweet words surrounding him.

Outside, the sky is darker than usual. Clouds are hiding the moon, and stars are nowhere to see.

They spent the day after like it was the last : Tsukishima got more and more difficulties to walk, but Kuroo almost carried him and it was alright. Both of them could enjoy a nice weather outside, letting the breeze teasing them; they had a deep chat about their future and beyond. It wasn’t as fun as the latest chats they had together but they both believed it was the moment to speak about it. When they came back to the room, it was already time for Kuroo to get back to his house. They separate with a saddened look, saying good night and what was almost like a ritual : “See you tomorrow”.

Chapter 2: Shooting star

One day more.

Tsukishima was forced to stay in his bed, as his condition has worsened from all his walking days with his lover; he couldn’t even move his legs properly, as if they were paralyzed. Kuroo took some days-off from university and his part-time job to stay all the day with his lover. He tried to talk with him, but even his voice became weaker and they couldn’t speak for too long since Tsukishima’s condition forced him to sleep a lot; Kuroo would then take his hands and watch him sleeping, checking from time to time if he was still breathing.

Relieved as he made sure he was still here, he got sleepy as well and fell asleep hand in hand with his boyfriend, until nightfall. When he woke up, he didn’t realize he was still at hospital, but quickly came back to the reality : the night falling was meaning that the day was finishing… Tsukishima was still sleeping, so Kuroo thought he woke up when he was still sleeping, since his hand changed of position. He decided to stay nevertheless, but to sleep on the bench seat outside the room, as the nurses were asking him to go out so as he wouldn't disturb his peaceful sleep…

Few hours more.

When Kuroo woke up by the ruckus from the corridors, he has a blanket on him, surely put by one of the nurse passing through during the night. He smiled at the kind attention and was facing the door where his lover was supposedly sleeping : “Tsukishima Kei” could he read on the plate next to the door; he had a weird sensation while reading it : he had the impression not to realize what was happening. Obviously he was aware his boyfriend was terminally-ill, but…

Just a few hours left and he would disappear.

This one thought was hitting him like a club. He breathed out loudly, and then watched from left to right if there wasn’t any nurse passing by so he could ask if he could visit his lover. He then let out of his pocket a small box, before staring at it with bitter eyes. Some minutes are passing by before a nurse appeared in his sight. Seeing him on the bench seat, she approached him, asking if he was “Tsukishima-kun’s friend”. When he answered by the affirmative, she announced him he was transferred to another room during the night, since ‘the moment’ has come, so he could see him a last time before the end.

When he arrived in front of the room the nurse has shown him, he could see, through the glazed window, his lover’s family surrounding him : his parents, and his brother Akiteru, who were seeming to speak casually to him, like nothing would happen. He didn’t want to disturb the last moments they could spend as a family so he just sat on the bench seat in front of the room. It didn’t take long before Akiteru noticed him and go out from the room before greeting Kuroo.

“Hello Kuroo-san… thank you for coming here,” he began, “and thank you for always taking care of my little brother…” he finished, while bowing his head.
“N—No don’t mention it… I should be the one thanking you…” he replied.
“Would you like to see him ? My parents are here for the moment, but I can tell them to—“ Akiteru suggested him, before Kuroo stopped him : “N—No thank you, I’ll wait. I shouldn’t interrupt… I’m going outside to breathe fresh air.”

He then stood up and while putting his hands on his pockets, headed out to the hospital’s entrance.

Outside, the sky is grey. Kuroo stretched out his hand, and felt some rain drops failing on his fingers.

He stayed some minutes on the outside steps of the hospital, staring at the grey sky. Soon, the drops were failing more intensely, causing to make much noise as they hit the ground. He didn’t know how much time passed as he was absorbed in his thoughts, remembering all the moments he spent with his lover. The sensations of his body were inhibited so he didn’t have the impression he was still standing up.

As the memories became stronger, a single tear fell from his eye, making its route to his cheek, before failing to the ground, joining the drops that were failing from the sky. The time seemed to be infinite for him. Kuroo was planning to take a walk around the hospital but it became impossible with the rain so he decided to return in the building, searching for another means to avoid over-thinking about what was going to happen in few hours… or even in a few minutes now; he didn’t know, since he lost track of the time.

Not looking where he was heading, he found himself stopping in front of a vendor machine. With a lifeless look, he put a coin inside and pushed on instinct the button indicated for the Pocari : the drink he used to take with his lover when they were still training together. Since Tsukishima had learnt he was affected by an incurable disease years ago, and from the moment he got transferred to Tokyo—since the hospital in Sendai didn’t have the facilities to treat his disease properly—they stopped having their trainings together as the tall boy was spending the most of his time taking health examinations and was banned from sport activity.

Closing his eyes and letting out a big sigh, he took some swallows of the drink before returning once more into his thoughts. Lost in the deep forest if his mind, he didn’t realize someone was coming for him :

“Is that were you were, Kuroo-san,” began the voice, “I thought you were outside to breathe some air.”

Turning his head where he heard the voice, he saw Akiteru, with his usual gentle smile yet tainted by sorrow.

“Kei said he wants to see you. We spent enough time with him now so you can go… we prepared ourselves for this moment a long time ago… please, realize a last time Kei’s selfish request,” he almost demanded, bowing his head.
With an expressionless face, Kuroo stood up and said a quick “Thank you, I’ll go”, before leaving Akiteru alone in the corridor. Heading to the room where his lover was, his heart began to beat faster; he wished he could exchange his heart and his health with his lover so he could live, even without him.

When he arrived in front of the room he was heading to, he saw some nurses in front of the door so he didn’t dare stepping in; however, Tsukishima saw him and a faint yet warm smile illuminated his face. When the nurses finished removing all the threads that left him alive, Kuroo entered the room, a melancholic expression of his face. He got closer to his lover who was laid on a bed, as closer as he could. He then took his hand and kneeled down his bed, since there weren’t any seat. Tsukishima simply answered by holding back Kuroo’s hand as tightly as he could, bringing a warm smile on the latter’s face.

Outside, rain is now failing without stopping, letting drops racing on the window Kuroo could see in the room where he was.

“… You finally came… huh ? I’m glad…” said with a weak voice the blond boy.
“You idiot… obviously I’d come. We’re speaking about you… after all…” finished Kuroo, as if someone has stabbed a knife in his heart; he was desperately trying to retain tears failing from his eyes.
“ Why… are you looking like… you’ll cry… ?” asked in a faint chuckle his lover. “I don’t… remember… doing anything… worth of you… crying for me…” he ended, smiling honestly.
“I’m not ! I’m not crying ! And even if I were,” declared Kuroo, as tears were beginning to fall from his eyes, “you don’t have to tell anything !”
“You’re… even worst… than me…” simply whispered Tsukishima, before changing of subject, looking at the ceiling of the room, “Ah… I wish you could… teach me… other… blocking techniques… I miss… volleyball…” he regretted.
“I already taught you all you needed to know… you became a really proficient middle-blocker… you even won against Shiratorizawa… I don’t have anything more to teach you…” he announced, between two sobbing, before continuing, “but the only thing I missed to teach you is how much I love you,” he whispered.
Tsukishima let out a weak laugh at that time before replying : “You’re really… an embarrassing guy… I already… told you…”
“Just because I’m with you,” he concluded gently, patting his lover’s head.
“Stop… treating me… like… a kid… !” was trying to say in a louder voice Tsukishima.
“I’m not, Kei,” simply stated Kuroo.

Suddenly, Tsukishima felt a sharp pain in his chest, which made his eyes closed in pain for some seconds before it went away. He then breathed loudly, afraid for a moment it’d be over.
“Kei, what’s wrong ? Are you alright ?” asked in a worried tone Kuroo.
“N—Nothing… I’m alright… but…” he managed to say, before adding, “Sorry, Kuroo-san… it seems… it’ll end… soon…” he let out in a whisper.

At this moment, reality hit once more Kuroo : his lover was affected by an incurable disease, terminally-ill, and now was the moment nothing retained him anymore to the living world. He believed he could stop the time if he was still speaking casually with his most precious person, but seemed that reality was stronger than anything. Before he could think further, he took from his pocket the small box he was staring at when he woke up from his night in the bench seat; which was actually a jewel case. All this time he wanted to find the right timing to propose to his lover, but couldn’t… and now was his last chance. “What a bad timing… I’m just the worst…” was thinking Kuroo, as he opened the box in front of his lover.

Before Tsukishima could react and before any explication, Kuroo took his lover’s hand before slipping the ring onto his finger.

“K—Kuroo-san… what… ?” said in a painful way Tsukishima.
“A ring. I was planning to give it to you earlier but I couldn’t find the right timing… I’m sorry. Will you marry me, Kei ?” he asked, while clenching his lover’s fist onto his.
“It’s… maybe a little… too late… for this…” simply stated the boy, before continuing, “But I’m really glad… I got to… meet you… Tetsurou-sa—“

He didn’t have the time to finish his sentence. His eyes then closed slowly, and his body didn’t move anymore; Kuroo believed he was still thinking about what to say next, so he released his fist from his lover’s; but it’s at that moment he noticed Tsukishima unclenched his fist. Plus, his entire arm felt heavy, as if he was unconscious. To make sure it was what he thought on the second, he stood up, and pressed his lips against his lover’s… the latter didn’t return the kiss. Desperate, he checked if he was breathing and felt no sign of his heart beating.

It was over.

He wasn’t crying. He didn’t say anything. Kuroo just stepped backwards, as if he was afraid to get closer of what was now a corpse. He then quickly felt the need to go out the room, where he sensed he wanted to vomit. A nurse saw him going out of the room and immediately understood the situation by watching to the bed at the center of the room. She then called her colleagues and they barged into the room, checking Tsukishima’s pulse. It’s when Kuroo saw one of the nurses shaking her head from left to right that he understood he was right.

His lover was no longer in this world.

Another nurse then came into the room, where she put a piece of white tissue on the blond boy’s face. While watching what was taking place in front of his eyes, Kuroo had a blank look.

“… ‘until death do us part’… huh ?” he whispered.

When he came back to his home, he directly headed to his balcony to watch the sky.

Outside, the sky is dark, unveiling a path of stars. He couldn’t see the moon anymore but after staring a while at the celestial sphere, he could see a shooting star; that one star was shining more than the other, before disappearing in the sea of thousands of other stars.

At the funeral, Kuroo had a gloomy atmosphere around him; it was taking place in Sendai and he came here to say a last goodbye to his lover. At the celebration, he was sat just behind his lover’s family, and when it was his turn to pay respects to his deceased lover, he saw he was still wearing the ring at his finger; apparently, the nurses didn’t manage to remove it, as if his body was unconsciously fighting to keep it. At the moment his mother saw him, after the ceremony, she called out to him : “Tetsurou-kun, you came. Thank you… thanks for all you did for Kei,” she said, bowing her head. She looked at her with a lifeless look and replied “It was nothing,” bowing back his head, and heading back to the place’s entrance.

Outside, the sky is darker than usual. There’s no cloud and it’s pouring, as if the sky was crying along with Kuroo’s heart. A storm is approaching.

He wasn’t in the mood to stay after the rite so he decided to walk around to know more about his lover’s native city. Not paying attention to his surrounding, and too distracted by the loud noise of the drops failing from the sky and hitting the ground, he didn’t notice he was now walking on a busy street, and was heading unconsciously to a zebra crossing, not watching at the traffic light. At the moment he crossed the street, a truck plough at full speed into Kuroo.

He got thrown at several meters, not having the time to realize nor dodging it. Kuroo lied unconscious on the ground, blood flowing from his head, as rain was continuing to fall and storm was beginning to rumble…

Chapter 3: For our future and beyond

“Kuroo-san ? Kuroo-san ?! Just wake up for the love of God ! Kuroo-san !!” he heard. Still in the darkness, he saw a ray of light coming from far away.

Huh ? I’m still alive ?
Where does this voice comes from… ?
I have the sensation I heard it somewhere—

“No good, he’s not waking up… it’s weird, the monitor is showing signs of normal activity… I don’t understand…” was continuing the voice.

That’s right, Kei died.
I have no reason to live anymore…
It’d be better if I join him in Paradise…

“And so, did he woke up, Tsukishima-sensei ?”
Another voice added in the discussion.
“He’s not. Maybe I should slap him ?” said the first voice.
“That’s really risky !! Please don’t do that, sensei…” almost demanded the second voice.

Did I heard ‘Tsukishima’ ?
The family name of my lover…
The name of the person I love the most—

Suddenly, Kuroo opened his eyes, facing two persons in white coat. He was lying in a bed, and began to hear the constant noise of the machine that measured his heartbeats. He looked at left and right, a little disoriented.

“Good morning, Kuroo-san,” said calmly the first voice, “how do you feel ?”
“W—where I am… ? Who are you ?” he asked, panicked.
“Calm down. You’re at hospital. You got hit by a truck and stayed in coma for several weeks. Glad you’re awake now… ah, and I’m Tsukishima Kei, the doctor in charge of your case; and this is Yamada Kazunori-san, who will be in charge of your rehabilitation,” he said, bowing his head; the other person did the same.

His view was still blurry so he didn’t see clearly the physical appearance of the two doctors in front of him. It took some seconds for him to retrieve a normal vision, before an acute image formed into his eyes, unveiling properly the doctor and his colleague. He immediately noticed the doctor had exactly the same appearance than his deceased boyfriend, which made him jump from his bed.

“Kei ?! Is that you ?!” he exclaimed, failing from his bed since his legs weren’t stable.
“Oh oh oh, already on the first name basis ? You really got a bold patient, Tsukishima-sensei,” teased Yamada.
“Shut up, Yamada,” the doctor replied while glaring at his colleague.
“Haha okay okay I understand ! The nuisance will now take its leave,” he claimed, while heading to the door and chuckling. He leaved the room soon after.

Now just the two of them, Tsukishima took the initiative to help his patient.

“I don’t know who you’re mistaking me with,” he began, while taking his hand to help Kuroo who was on the ground, “but you shouldn’t try to get out of bed like that. Since you haven’t done your rehabilitation you can’t walk properly,” he finished tranquilly. When he helped him to get on the bed, Kuroo noticed he had a ring around his neck.

“T—Thank you. Can I ask a question ?” he almost whispered.
“What ?” Tsukishima just replied.
“Where did you get that ring ?” he inquired bluntly.
“It’s none of your business,” retorted the doctor, “I’ll come back later for a check-up. For the moment, just relax and take back forces,” he finished, while heading out of the room.

Alone in his room, Kuroo remembered what he said once to his lover :

“Even if you disappear, I’ll find you once more, and I’ll once again fall in love with you, over and over; I don’t imagine my life with another person than you by my side.”

He just had to start all over again to gain his love once more.